The Meaning of Life

I think I got it now:

• Life is a near-death experience.  George Carlin
• You live and learn. At any rate, you live.  Douglas Adams
• Not a shred of evidence exists in favor of the idea that life is serious.  Brendan Gill
• Life consists in what a man is thinking of all day.  Ralph Waldo Emerson
• Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering-and it's all over much too soon.  Woody Allen
• Life is what happens when you're not watching television.  Jason Love
• Life isn't fair.  It's just fairer than death, that's all.  William Goldman
• Life is something to do when you can't get to sleep.  Fran Lebowitz
• Life is an extraordinary adventure.  If only it would start already.  Larry Carlat